Just in time for Christmas! Find your copy of The Accident ABC's here.

The trailer had had quite enough of Bert getting fresh.

Somehow, the game of "danger ball" just never caught on.

Though creative, Jane's "refrigerator" Halloween costume did make it hard to dance.

What? What do you keep in your lightning cupboard?

Here is Letter L from the Accident ABC's: Lazy Larry's Last Load of Logs.

That awkward moment with the lunch tray when you realize no one wants you to sit with them.

Quadruple amputation was not enough. The machine was determined to do something about Bob's ugly shirt.

They seemed like such a nice family. No one could have foreseen the incident with the milkman and the trash compactor.

He always knew they'd catch up to him someday. But he never expected this.

The gendarme gave her suitcase a cursory glance, then winked and waved her through.

Let's see: Mittens? Check. Pointy-toed shoes? Check. Sense of balance and/or dignity? Oops.

This one's for my Stick Figure child. First day of school today. (sniff)

The apple, sadly, didn't fall far from the tree.

When the jeep swerved, the fish saw their chance to escape.

Here is Letter M in The Accident ABC's: Melvin was mugged in the Montreal Metro.

Somehow, the Perilous Handbag trend just never took off.

The robot just couldn't take another of Ray's stupid jokes.

Worth doing, if you're bendy enough.

Infant origami: The next unfortunate crafting trend.

The zombies are coming. There is no escape.

He learned the hard way to keep quiet about his levitation skills on the first date.

One should never caress the Saw-Toothed Breasts of Doom.

Travel = Opportunities to gather new signage. Back in a week!

Not the best place to practice your "Thriller" dance routine.

Unless, I suppose, you're truly among the ranks of the undead. Then it might help.

Lesson two of Putting People in Boxes: If you have two people, you may have to stack them.

n.b. With extremely large people, consider flinging arrows at them instead.

Lesson one of Putting People in Boxes: Choose a box of sufficient size.

See, if we imagine Mr. StickFigureMan is the CEO of British Petroleum …

The one-legged man chose his path with care, remembering what had happened the last time.

Swimming = good. Swimming in the wood chipper = bad.

This is Letter E in the Accident ABC's: Eaten by Equipment. How Embarrassing.

The man hated the horse for his superior anatomical detail. The horse, for his part, just wished the man had legs so he'd get off and walk once in a damn while.

The day he found the Giant Magic Acorn on the Thames Path, his life forever changed.

And you should see what it does to bicycles.

Actually, Death by Soda Machine Squishing is an important mechanism of natural selection.

The man was mesmerized by his companion's spontaneous step-dance. The dog, however, was unimpressed.

Laundry: It's just too dangerous. Don't risk it.

From his window high above the traffic, the man watched. And waited.

Revenge of the Dumpster.

Letter I in the Accident ABC's: The Ice, Iris found, was Insufficient.

Gene was proud that he had finally been named a member of the Safety Patrol.

I found this one at the Ommegang Brewery in Cooperstown. Oh, the risks people take for beer.

Perhaps a sign your "Led Zeppelin" mix tape is too loud.

Getting it from all sides today? Me, too.

Thanks, Captain Obvious.

Unexpectedly, the tractor was wielding a lightsaber.

It's Monday. Here's a Monday Clunk.

This is Letter Q in the Accident ABC's: It Quickly Quashed his Quadriceps.

Somehow, her dinners never came out looking like those on the Food Network.

The one-legged man's aura was irresistible.